Hi Druben! I use crochet as an outlet. I take all the knots in my body from the pain and put them into the yarn and sometimes wonderous things happen. I've also become a pretty good hoop dancer and use fire to cleanse my energy. Although I do make hoops when I am tense, I cannot be in pain when I make them, I'm afraid that I might bind that negative aspect into the hoop and pass the energy onto it's user.

No
No artwork anymore, I used to love it
Now I dance

Druben,
Originally I learned the stitchery that I do as pain management. I still use it for that. I also do Tatting to rid myself of pain. I will load images of both here.

Tatt.

Setting: A sunny bedroom. I'm laying on my back with a pillow under my legs. A laptop is propped up on a cushion that lay across my lap. Pain is sitting at the foot of my bed. Pain is a small troll-like man wearing dark glasses and a jester's hat. He watches me and occasionally honks a shiny brass horn, startling me.


ME: Pain, fuck you. I hate you. I had an identity outside of you before you came and screwed up my life.
PAIN: Oh, c'mon, how about all that interpersonal growth you've gained? Wouldn't have that without me.
ME: You may have a point, but I'm forgetting who I was, or, not appreciating whom I'm becoming with you.
PAIN: I bring you gifts, sympathy from others, an attractive physical therapist, not to mention time off from work, and this is how you relate to me?
ME: I don't want any of that-- well, sometimes...sometimes I want some of it. Sometimes I want some of it and I hate that about me. Please don't get me wrong, I do respect you, I just also hate your fucking guts. ;-)
PAIN: Your smiling suggests a light tone of sarcasm.
ME: Actually it was a grimace. My sciatic nerve was reminding me that its neighborhood is getting overcrowded. There has been a property-line dispute between it and his neighbor, a lumbar-sacral disc.

PAIN: Here, take one of these...
ME: OK. >gulp<. Ahhh....
DOPAMINE: >squirt, squirt<
ME: That's much better.
PAIN: See? I can make it all better.
ME: Actually, I can still feel it, I just don't care quite as much. I don't really mind anything right now, actually. I still can walk very well though...
PAIN: Walking is overrated.
ME: Yes, I can see all that now. It looks more manageable now. Pain, thank you. I love you. Without you I might not ever feel this good.
DOPAMINE: >squirt, squirt<

PAIN smiles at me and gently pats me on the right foot until it is numb. I fall asleep.

I wake up, PAIN is still there. PAIN honks the shiny brass horn, startling me again.


ME: PAIN, fuck you. I hate you. I had an identity outside of you before you came and screwed up my life.
PAIN: >Laughing softly to himself<

Went to the rehearsal studio today. We played for over 4 hours! It was great! We only get together about 1x/month, so we make the most of it. We all played well. Achey as all get out right now, but nothing worse than the past 12-18 months or so.
We have a myspace. Once I get some music uploaded to it, I'll let you know.

D~